• carolccmiller

do i have to be thankful?

This week in the US we are celebrating Thanksgiving where we place our focus on gratitude and thanks for our many blessings. It also starts the beginning of the holiday season filled with good cheer, hope, and kindness, and yet while many are celebrating the holiday season, there are others who are suffering and wonder what they have to be thankful about. 

I send each of you LOVE to heighten your celebrations or lessen your sorrows as I am grateful for each of you sharing this journey of life with me. Check out my reasons to be thankful below as you move through anything that doesn’t bring you love and happiness.


Someone I LOVE just died; do I have to be thankful? Being thankful can start the moment you hear the news that a LOVED one transitioned. It can occur during the mourning process. We all grieve differently. For some thinking of memories initially brings more pain, while for others thinking of the good times brings a sense of relief. However you grieve, know it is part of the process of healing and only you can determine the depth of your grief and the time required to heal. Be thankful for the time you did have with this person and the role they played in your life. Affirm: I am thankful for the LOVE we shared.

My romantic relationship just ended and I am sad; do I have to be thankful? Just like physical death, the ending of a relationship has a time of mourning for what is gone and we need to mourn what could have been. Find things to be thankful for in the relationship and take that feeling into your future relationships as gratitude allows love to grow bigger and deeper. Affirm: I am thankful for the LOVE we shared.

A big tragedy has just occurred in the world; do I have to be thankful? Whether the tragedy is man-made or from nature, sadness, anger, and a sense of powerlessness often occur. And yet, our innate nature of goodness shines forth as community and global neighbors come together to help each other rebuild what was broken. Move through your feelings of fear while knowing good always comes about during and after tragedy. Affirm: I am thankful for how people come together to help each other through tragedy. I am lonely; do I have to be thankful? Loneliness can be heightened during the holiday season when others are outwardly showing their happiness. When you are feeling lonely, think of as many things you can that you like about yourself and focus on that. When you see other happy people, say to yourself “I would like that too” or “That’s for me!” Seek out help because you deserve to feel connected with others. Affirm: I am thankful for knowing I deserve to feel connected with others and I am worthy of seeking and allowing that connection.

Life offers us peaks and valleys, ebbs and flows, happiness and sorrow and all of those experiences are woven together to create this beautifully messy world. Positivity doesn’t mean stuffing your sadness; rather, it means moving through it with gentleness for yourself and others. Positivity doesn’t mean laughing when you want to cry; rather, it means knowing your tears allow your reasons for laughter to feel even better.  

My wish for you this week and every week hereafter is to feel thanks for all of your experiences from the celebrations to the sorrows, from tears to laughter, and from fear to LOVE.

Until next time, thank you for allowing me into your life to be a reminder that YOU MATTER. 


I am thankful for all people and experiences in my life. Words to LOVE by:

“Sometimes our light goes out but is blown into flame by another human being. Each of us owes deepest thanks to those who have rekindled this light.” ~ Albert Schweitzer

“Develop an attitude of gratitude, and give thanks for everything that happens to you, knowing that every step forward is a step toward achieving something bigger and better than your current situation.” ~ Brian Tracy

“If we magnified blessings as we magnify disappointments, we would all be much happier.”  ~ John Wooden Sounds for Your Soul:

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